Inside Thoughts With Outside Voices
Are you an introvert or extrovert? Most people probably fall somewhere in the middle, but for those of us who fall firmly on one end of the spectrum, it can be difficult to understand the other side. This article will debunk 10 common misconceptions about introverts, and 10 common misconceptions about extroverts.fr
1. Quiet Doesn't Mean Shy
Perhaps the most common misconception about introverts is that a person keeps quiet because they are shy. This couldn't be farther from the truth. While shyness, introversion, and social anxiety can all overlap, there's just as big of a chance that someone is thinking before they speak.
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2. Meaningful Conversation > Small Talk
One of the ways introverts can initially come off as rude is by disliking small talk. While introverts understand that small talk can be a stepping stone to more meaningful conversation, they're often reluctant to partake in it. Introverts love a reason to talk, rather than just to fill the air.
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3. Canceling Plans Isn't Always Personal
While canceling plans with little notice might come off as rude, introverts don't mean it that way. Introverts understand that canceled plans can be frustrating to other people, but sometimes social batteries need to be recharged at inconvenient times. It doesn't mean that they don't want to spend time with you, it just means that they don't have the emotional bandwidth to do so right now.
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4. Introvert Doesn't Mean Anti-Social
Once you get an introvert to open up, they'll love to spend time with you! However, they're more likely to crave one-on-one interaction than big social events. Introverts aren't anti-social, they just might be overwhelmed by crowds.
5. Silence Isn't A Burden
While extroverts may perceive silence as dead air, introverts are more than happy to simply exist. If they're quiet, it doesn't mean that they don't have anything it say. An introvert may be enjoying their environment, collecting their thoughts, or happy to spend time with another person.
6. There Is No On/Off Switch
Introverts can't simply turn on a switch and be social. Likewise, they don't power down when a social event ends. Sometimes introverts have the emotional bandwidth to join in conversations or events, sometimes they don't.
7. Social Activity Takes Recovery
A drained social battery doesn't replenish overnight. For every hour an introvert spends socializing with others, they likely need an hour to recharge. Focusing on hobbies or interests can help introverts replenish energy.
8. Silence Can Be Shared
Just because alone time can be useful in recharging social batteries doesn't mean that introverts want to be alone all the time. For them, quality time isn't always high-octane social activities. Quality time can be as simple as hanging out with a friend while you work together.
9. Introversion Doesn't Mean Agoraphobia
Just like with social anxiety, there is some overlap between introversion and agoraphobia, but not total. Most introverts aren't afraid of public places, they'd just prefer to stay home. Introverts are homebodies and put a lot of time and energy into curating their space.
10. Invitations Are Always Welcome
Introverts may not always be able to hang out or stay for a long time, but invitations still mean a lot. Excluding them from invitations because you assume that they won't go is one of the quickest ways to lose an introvert's friendship.
Now that we've gone through some things introverts want you to know, let's talk a little bit about extroverts.
1. Invitations Aren't Meaningless
On the other hand, extroverts don't extend invitations just because they can. Extroverts love being surrounded by people and spending time with them. If they invite you to a party, you can bet that they'll take time to talk to you.
2. Quality Time Is Rejuvenating
While introverts may recharge their social batteries through alone time, extroverts crave social interactions. If they seem clingy, it's because they know nobody else will take the initiative to plan a get-together.
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3. Friendliness Isn't Flirtation
Friendliness can easily be confused with flirtation, which can lead to extroverts being unfairly stereotyped as promiscuity. The chances are that an extrovert is trying to get to know you without any ulterior motives. When you're being flirted with, you'll know.
4. Extrovert Doesn't Mean Constant Chatter
Extroverts don't talk just so they can hear the sound of their own voices. While they often feel uncomfortable with too much silence, they can also get as much enjoyment from observing as they do from chatting. An extrovert being "on" doesn't mean they're always going to be talking a mile a minute.
5. But Sometimes It Does
Generally, introverts take time to formulate their thoughts before speaking, while extroverts find it easier to work through thoughts verbally. If an extrovert is really passionate about a topic, they'll talk about it, a lot, especially if the other person is interested.
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6. Nobody Loves Small Talk
Extroverts aren't asking you about the weather or traffic because they have nothing else to say, they use small talk as a means of opening up larger avenues of conversation. Extroverts find small talk just as awkward as introverts. They use small talk as a way to make other parties comfortable talking.
7. Alone Time Is Welcome
Extroverts may prefer to spend time with other people, but that doesn't mean that they'll implode if they're left alone with their thoughts for five minutes. Just like introverts, extroverts can get overwhelmed. They also enjoy partaking in solitary activities such as crafting or reading.
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8. Friends Are The More The Merrier
An extrovert having a lot of friends doesn't mean those friendships are expendable. Extroverts may seem to value quantity over quality, but, really, they like being surrounded by as many people as possible. Besides, different friends can serve different purposes.
9. Idle Chatter Isn't Meaningless
Just like we said above, extroverts can be prone to word vomit. Extroverts love to talk as a way to share their passions, but they also talk to give other people a chance to speak up. This may seem counterproductive, but sometimes when an extrovert asks you a question, they're also asking you to take over the conversation for a bit.
10. Extroverts Can Be Shy
Shyness doesn't automatically go away when you're an extrovert. While extroverts may come off as confident, that confidence may be in their social skills rather than their self-worth. An extrovert can be the life of the party but still lack self-confidence.
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