How To Handle The Dating Apps
In today's primarily online world, most people meet others and enter relationships thanks to dating apps like Hinge, Tinder, and Bumble. While it's definitely more convenient, it does change the dating landscape greatly. How you present yourself on your profile, how you answer, and how you take your photos are all suddenly more important than ever! So if you're new to the game or simply are seeking ways to improve, here are 10 things you shouldn't do on dating apps and 10 tips to help you find success.
1. Using Cliché Pickup Lines
Let's just say the moment you use an overused pickup line, it might already be over before the talking has started. These phrases tend to do the opposite of what you intended: they turn people off! All it does is make it seem like you didn't put in any effort to try and make a connection.
2. Sticking To A Script
Don't try the exact same conversation starters and lines with every person you match with - keep things lively and fresh! It's not just for your own sake, it's for the opposite party too. You don't want to appear like a robot that's reading from a script; you want to seem present and interested in getting to know each other more.
3. Don't Use Group Photos
When using dating apps, you can't hide behind other people. While using one group photo might be okay if other users can identify you, you shouldn't be making all of your photos ones with multiple people. Your profile is supposed to be about you and others want to be able to clearly see what you look like. It's just as what you would want out of other people's profiles!
4. Don't Catfish
The last thing dating app users want to deal with is someone who catfishes and lies about their appearance or themselves. People put in a lot of trust when using these mediums, so do your best to honor that. Do you really want to deal with the repercussions?
5. Feel Obligated To Say Yes
If you're not feeling a spark or connection, don't lead people on! Some people feel guilty and continue talking or even agree on dates simply out of obligation. People deserve to know how you truly feel, and you deserve to be with someone you actually feel interested in. Just do the right thing and speak your true thoughts.
6. Rush Into Things
Even if you really like someone, never put pressure or try to rush into things - it'll only backfire. Not only does it make people feel nervous, it doesn't give you a chance to really see if you like them. You're not being timed, so don't act like you are.
7. Meet In A Private Place
For your own safety and to make sure that the opposite party feels safe too, always suggest meeting in an open, public environment, never a private space. The dangers of dating apps are that, well, you've never actually met! It can be scary putting your trust in someone you met online, so do what you can to make your first meeting as comfortable as possible.
8. Be Too Picky
While it's important you have standards, just make sure you're not reaching too high. If you start caring about every little detail from their height to their job, it's just going to make it so much harder for you. Be reasonable, be open, and most importantly, be understanding.
9. Talk To Too Many People At Once
While yes, there's nothing wrong with talking to multiple people on the dating apps, it might get hard to build real connections if you start caring about quantity over quality. It might be a good idea to limit how many people you match with at once - this way you can develop deeper bonds with the ones you do (or try to).
10. Become Obsessed
While you want to respond in a quick manner so your match isn't left waiting in the dark, you shouldn't become attached to your dating apps by the hip either. This creates an unhealthy mindset where you grow to expect responses and matches every single day.
1. Have A More Open Mindset
It can be easy locking yourself in a hole of thinking you need to find success quickly on the dating apps, but all that does it create a negative experience. Approach the whole thing with a much more open mindset and you'll learn to be more relaxed and even enjoy meeting people!
2. Try To Have Fun
Connecting with people might start feeling like a chore, so change your perspective and have fun with it! Just think about how cool it is to meet all these unique people you normally wouldn't get to see, or think of it as a fun activity that pushes you to go outside your comfort zone.
3. Make New Friends
If anything, don't see your losses as losses. If a relationship doesn't work out, why not try to be friends? Maybe the people you meet on the apps aren't meant for you romantically, but that doesn't mean you can't give friendship a go! Besides, who knows, maybe your new friend will be able to introduce you to someone themselves.
4. Don't Be Hard On Yourself
It's okay if success doesn't come easily - it's likely the case for everyone trying to find their special someone. Just because a relationship or match doesn't pan out doesn't mean it's because of you or that you failed to make it happen. You deserve someone who truly likes and cares for you, and finding that person will take time.
5. Give People A Chance
Are you quick to reject someone before even getting to know them? Hold your horses; how do you expect to find a successful match if you don't give people a chance? Because you truly never know when a spark might develop. Not everyone is super confident right from the get go!
6. Take Good Photos
The best way to give your profile a boost is to make sure you have flattering photos that really capture your energy and personality. It's something you have control over, so make it count! After all, it's the first impression people get on the apps so it's incredibly important!
Antoine Beauvillain on Unsplash
7. Let Your Personality Shine Through
We know it can be hard putting yourself out there, but the best path to go in finding a match is to just be yourself. From your photos to your prompts to your responses, always let your personality shine through. Let them see a small piece of the real you so others can decide if they're interested and want to pursue.
8. Don't Copy Others
There can only be one you in the world, so why bother trying to hide all your uniqueness behind the ideas of someone else? Don't read other people's prompts and feel a need to copy them - it just takes away from you! You should never be answering or updating your profile to best fit what you think other people want, it should solely reflect upon you.
9. Don't Give Up
Keep your head up high! Rejection is just one step closer for you to find your true soul mate. When the going gets tough, or it ends up taking longer than you expected, it's your strength and motivation that will carry you through.
10. Increase Your Range
While it's obviously preferable to meet someone really close by you, if you're struggling to find someone, try increasing your range. You may have to drive out a bit further to meet them, but it might just widen your scope and allow you to meet someone wonderful.
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